Chris you mean to tell me you put your pants on one leg at a time too?
colleen coplick
· 11 months ago
fantastic post Chris. I love reading your site - your insights are quote often fantastic and potent food for thought.
i look forward to seeing you again soon!! :)
Sarah Wurrey
· 11 months ago
These are all excellent points, and something I try to stress to people who are nervous about going to social media events where they don't "know anyone." Personally, I see attending events where I don't know anyone as major opportunities. When I was in Boston, it was so easy for me to sit with everyone I knew already at the various breakfasts, SMC meetings, etc. I fell victim to the comfort zone of my peeps, people like you, Pistachio, Garfield, Nathan Burke, Chip, etc.
I'm heading to my first SMC DC meeting tomorrow night, and save a couple folks I don't recognize a single name on the RSVP list. And I couldn't be more excited. If people view this as an opportunity to connect rather than an intimidating nightmare, it helps.
Then again, I'm one of the more extroverted people I know. ;-) Advice like this is tough for the terminally shy.
David Leonhardt
· 11 months ago
Bang on. Quantity is helpful in certain situations, but quality will always trump quantity. So use the numbers when you must and just do what you know you should do when you can.
Martha Young
· 11 months ago
Great post - treating everyone equally and with respect for their perspectives is sound advice for all of us.
CouchSurfingOri
· 11 months ago
Darn wise words if I ever heard 'em. Took me a while to think of people as people... I mean "Gosh! They're on tv. They're on the radio. They make 7 figures." -- As a photographer, people thought the same about the models I worked with "Oh my god! You have the best job! You get to work with all these hot models!" and I'd always reply "They're just people!" but it took a while to take my own advice when "leaving my niche" - you worded it really well.. and in this day and age when anyone can create a pedestal for themselves, it's important for people to realize that despite the fancy website, or 6 figure follower list... it's just a person.
JLibbey
· 11 months ago
You may spend most of your time making connections, but at least one of the illustrious names you mention is nothing more than a spammer on twitter in my opinion. You collect and share information while some of the others collect followers. Since "Pride goeth before a fall", I expect we'll see some of the pedestals will be toppled soon.
Greg Huntoon
· 11 months ago
Chris, I think it's really good to read something like this, especially after last month's pseudo-war between Loic and Scoble. It's a continuation, or different branch, of the same root discussion. People are simply people. The limelight, in the digital realm or elsewhere, does not place someone in some vaulted state. I just wrote about this earlier in the week.
I appreciate your candor. You're my hero. Hehehe.
Zoey Jordan
· 11 months ago
Hi Chris, I began following you on Twitter after I started reading your blog. It started for me because you offered valuable content. I stay with you, and continue to refer others to you, because not only do you consistently offer value, but you also do not condescend to readers, you keep it social, you interact, you share, you are "one of us." You are transparent (in a good way), you are helpful, and can I say...humble. While your numbers are very impressive, what I like about you is you are willing to take us with you on the journey. It's nice to be in the Chris Brogan circle of information. Thanks for being *real* Chris.
Chris Marsden
· 11 months ago
I think the thing I enjoyed most about meeting you was seeing how much you valued other people. You introduced me to other people and introduced them to me. When the "famous" people wandered over nothing changed. Your willingness to be "normal" and to treat the "normal" people as important was/is incredible. Thanks.
Average Jane
· 11 months ago
Every industry has its own rock stars who are unknown to the general public. My dad was (is?) in that category in his field, so it always amused me to see how awed and excited some people would get when they met him, even though by any standard definition of fame he's "just some guy."
As Sarah pointed out, this is a helpful post for people who find social media conferences intimidating.
Richard Reeve
· 11 months ago
With all your call backs, you were nothing short of a riot at WordCamp.
I think it's important to remember that reaching for influence is like trying to climb up on the pedestal. It's the pose of a usurper. Influence always carries a responsibility, an ethical bond toward those who trust you. That can be betrayed. We all have influence, to grow that is an issue of care.
Russ Palmer
· 11 months ago
'weblebrity' was just added to the urban dictionary..food for thought. And I love how you remember the fact that the word SOCIAL is part of the phrase SOCIAL media
Lori
· 11 months ago
I find that I may go a different direction with the "celebrity" thing. I am very aware that celebrities are regular people who sometimes are just trying to live life. So, I tend not to approach them, acknowledge them or try to engage them somehow. I'd be annoyed if I was at Starbucks and someone stopped me to take a picture or want to talk about something so, if I happen to see a celebrity I may smile, perhaps tweet the event but never say anything to them.
Is that better or worse than putting someone on a pedestal though? I probably miss out on interesting conversations with engaging people but I feel better giving them a little bit of "normal" life.
Chris Hall
· 11 months ago
Great point, Chris. Stats seem to breed status. I personally took your words to heart at SMJ and CES by briefly talking with as many people as i possibly could... Its something i am trying to work on in 2009, as it is really comfortable for me to stay in my shell and wait for people to approach me.
Taking the initiative and kicking off a conversation is more exciting, though, and you never know how easy it is to relate to most people by just asking a few harmless questions. :)
Susan Murphy
· 11 months ago
Excellent excellent excellent! I wish more people would be this frank when talking about popularity and fame.
I learned the lesson about people just being people a long time ago. Working in television, even on a local level, one gets to meet and work with all kinds of people, including people who have a certain "notoriety" or "fame". Over the years I got to meet got to meet plenty of famous folks, mostly bands, and meet and work with plenty of folks who weren't even famous yet (Barenaked Ladies and Tom Green come to mind).
Sure, when you first meet someone who is popular or famous, it can be exciting. But almost immediately, the novelty of that experience starts to wear off. Especially if you just look them in the eye, smile, and - ready for it - be yourself.
People are people are people. No matter how famous they are, mostly they just want to be treated like people. And you know what - the "welebrities" that you are itching to meet at the next conference, or trying to get the attention of on Twitter, are going to be MUCH more approachable if you don't suck up and just be yourself.
Rupert
· 11 months ago
I think people are pretty savvy about internet fame. I think it's more about competition for time. Because there's only so much time, there's only so many people you can talk to. If there's one recognisable person in a room, everyone wants to talk to them. And that person is mostly talking to all the people they do already know. Naturally. So to come and introduce yourself, you have to compete for that person's time. That's hard work. And mostly it just doesn't feel worth it.
I went to a social media breakfast in Vancouver last weekend. Took me 10 hours to get there and back. I recognised a lot of people from their blogs. So did a lot of other people. So those people had all their time taken up surrounded by people who recognised them. Naturally, nobody recognised me, and I ended up talking to a bunch of nice people I didn't recognise.
It's not that I put the bloggers I knew on a pedestal. I just didn't feel like competing for their time, and facing the inequality of me recognising them, and persuading them that I was worth them spending time talking to instead of all the people they already knew.
Luckily, I was fairly self-aware about that. In the old days - like when I used to go to film festivals - I'd get pretty chippy about people thinking they were bigshots.
But I realise now that it's just a question of numbers. I really don't have that much to say that it's worth shoehorning my introduction into these people's day. And that's not lack of self-worth. It's just that I have nothing to sell. So I hang out in the less competitive part of the room. And have a less stressful time. I bet there are a lot of people like me at every gathering you go to.
The only way around it is for the people who know they're well known to come round and talk to all the people they don't know. But that means they get less (or no) time talking to all the people they do already know and actually *want* to spend quality time with.
Hajj E. Flemings
· 11 months ago
Great post! We all put our pants on the same way and breathe the same air. There is so much focus that is put on numbers that I often wonder if organically gaining followership or being authentic has any value any more. I personally believe that when an individual is true to who they are that success and influence is imminent.
Damien Basile
· 11 months ago
Whenever I comment I look to add something new, but this time it just warrants a "Great job". You've conveyed what this instant communication tool that Twitter is all about- creating real open personable honest communications. There is nothing different between all of us except for perception of differences. We all came out as newborn babies, a veritable blank slate. The only thing that changes who we are and how we act are ourselves. We are the ones who allow our action/reaction to change. We are the only ones who can control our destinies. Ultimately our outlook on life, especially pertaining to ourselves, shades our encounters and experiences with the people we meet. I'm so glad you delineated this point so eloquently. It shows another side to you that I'm sure more people want to know- ESPECIALLY the funny side (!). ;D
Someone once said that "hell is other people". I'd add to that "if you allow it to be". In retrospect, I guess there was a bit more than saying "good job" here.
David Spinks
· 11 months ago
Chris,
I'd just like to say that one reason why I enjoy reading your blog every day is that I do find you to be a real person that cares about helping others. Even in the spotlight you have always been humble and welcoming and that is something that I have found to be inspiring. Thank you.
I was actually thinking about this last night and wanted to blog about it because it is a realization that may sound simple but many people don't think about, and it is so important. We are all people. In terms of bloggers, I feel that people view our community as a hierarchy that has leaders' communities that everyone must be part of and that's how it is built. What people don't appreciate is that each and every blogger is an equal part of the community. Leaders such as yourself, Chris, has a larger following and act as a large segment of the community but you are still just another voice in the larger picture, the same as everyone else.
Will have to elaborate in my own segment of the community at some point. (=
Dave
sean808080
· 11 months ago
Ha! What about those of us that demand pedestals and that everyone bow to us? What now?!?!
Seriously...some people are wrapped to tight.
Thanks for telling them, as Joan Rivers's gynecologist told her...'Relax!'
I would add that one quality that one reason certain people get put on a pedestal is because they're great at making connections, and more importantly being as accessible as possible. That's one of the advantages of Twitter, Comments, Ustream, etc.
So many people have great ideas out there, but I think its the ability of individuals to really care, respond and interact with users, as well as build community that sets them apart from the rest.
Jeremy Vaught
· 11 months ago
And don't be the guy that, when you are talking to them at a conference, they are looking over your should for someone cooler to talk to. (not you Chris, you don't do this, but plenty of peeps do)
Monique
· 11 months ago
Great post Chris! I always forget that you are just a person...a superstar-social media-amazing-bloggin'-person, but a person none-the-less. Thank you for always giving me something to ponder. Wish I got to meet you at CES 2009!
Efrain
· 11 months ago
Excellent reflection Chris!
I definitely think that the way people behave on-line should mirror their values and behaviour off-line. Its no secret one of the greatest things about social media is that it allows us to connect with a lot of people we admire, and they are often some kind of celebrity, but no matter how famous they are. You can always tell who the really big persons are by the way the relate and interact with people. For instance, last night, thanks to @rohitbarghava I was able to connect in twitter with @paulocoelho who was fast to welcome me, and I'm sure that doing that has been key for his success in connecting with so many people on-line and around the world. So anyway, loved the post and wante to say: thank you for making yoursefl approachable. Have a great week!
ajpape
· 11 months ago
Chris -
Valuable, helpful, and spot-on. I'm very new to Twitter and just started my blog, but excited about what this world, really this set of communicating tools, can offer.
I look forward to meeting sometime. In fact I have a question for you about how you see team dynamics and leadership helping or hurting progress in Web 2.0 organizations. Until this second I was deferring the question until I "knew you better" but, if it's a topic you have any passion for I'd love your thoughts. A tweet? A quick phone interview that I'd blog? Let me know if this appeals. It's my passion.
Thanks again for this piece. Nice example of "authenticity is the currency of 2.0." A.J. Pape
Shawn Thompson
· 11 months ago
Chris:
You have a terrific ability to write directly and convey valuable information while being personal. Thanks for writing cogently about things I need to know. I think you have hit on a critical point here, which is not that "celebrities" are just people, but that we are all people too. We matter. We can do great work. We all need to remember that we can all have a place at the discussion. It's difficult sometimes, when someone "famous" is present, to remember that. But please, to paraphrase from your Scoble anecdote above, have "something to say", not just a desire to be heard.
Shawn
Brenda Heisler
· 11 months ago
So true. So simple people dismiss it. At our golf course we have "the variety pack" and treat everyone the same. Our staff doesn't know the rich from the not so rich and we don't tell them which is which. We've found in the golf business, that it's the game that's the equalizer. Just treat everyone with respect.
NaughtyReviews
· 11 months ago
This is a very interesting post. The problem of “managing scale” that occurs as a result of effectively making connections through time intensive relationship building is quite the catch 22: the community that follows one’s work does so because of the genuine relationships cultivated while one was on the rise…but, now that one has risen, those relationships are difficult to maintain with the same level of intimacy…
Allen Kelly
· 11 months ago
Chris,
To be perfectly honest, this is the first time I have actually read this blog. I always follow your tweets, watch your videos online, and read other random articles and interviews around the Web.
I am subscribed now. Not just to this blog, but to your message - a message that seems to be rooted deeply in your aspirations.
Liz Strauss recently said, "I don't care what you know unless I know that you care."
I know you care so now I want to know what you know.
It's hard to treat all people the same, but it is possible to treat all people fairly. I'm not going to read everyone's blog and value their opinion as much as I would yours. I'm always going to be looking UP to you as a teacher, but that is because you step down from the pedestal at every opportunity. It is your followers that put you back up there - on display - for everyone else to see.
People are people, but some people are better at it than others.
Your newest subscriber, -Allen
Nathan Hangen
· 11 months ago
That's why I'm such a huge fan of yours Chris. You keep it real.
Michael Booker
· 11 months ago
Great post. I had always thought about how an interaction between me and you (or any other so-called "web celebrity") would go. Would you shun me for not having the prowess that you do? Or would you engage in a meaningful convo with me? Its good to see it would probably be the latter.
JimCanuck
· 11 months ago
Agreed with the other commenters on this post. And having watched your most entertaining yet educational performance (not a presentation) at WordCamp Las Vegas, I did tweet that when the next late night show opening occurs (any network) you should be a candidate.
But what I will always remember is the way you treated me when we actually met up personally after your time in front of us. I went away from our discussion thinking, "Wow, Chris is just simply human!" You (along with Lorelle who followed you) made my whole trip to LV worthwhile.
Looking forward to keeping in touch.
Mweshi
· 11 months ago
Another great post Chris! I can see that the spirit of ubuntu flows through you =)
Agitationist
· 11 months ago
You, sir, are completely full of yourself.
Uwe Hook
· 11 months ago
Anyone in the SM space can add value to the conservation. Even though we're all followers on Twitter, all of us should be leaders as well.
Coffee Talkee
· 11 months ago
You're really an amazing guy Chris! Thanks for bringing the light!
Jean Ghalo
· 11 months ago
cannot be less than impressed chris.... today is my first day visiting your blog and almost i spent like 4 hours, and post after the other i am getting much more impressed...
allow me to feature you and your blog in my tomorrow's blog post @ Jean Ghalo Blog
Nathan Koch
· 11 months ago
I think I prefer the term "Cewebrity" to "weblebrity". Perhaps a rising cewebrity would be a cewebutante? Just having fun with the words. You obviously have your head on straight.
Lisa B @ simply His
· 11 months ago
I wish you would have written this last June. I went to a conference and met some "big name" bloggers in my small circle. I was literally shell shocked and like a deer caught in headlights.
Now I'm going to a blogging conference in February and I'll definitely try to heed your advice. I hope I can engage others in conversation, listen to their wants and needs, and help as much as I can.
Kara
· 11 months ago
I could not agree with you more strongly. I think one of the best things about working in social media is that you get to be, well, social. When attending conferences, going to tweetups, or just talking to people online it is great to make common connections and meet amazing people. I also love how you are able to bring amazing people together. If we are attempting to make brands less elitist and engage with their customers, it only seems right that we follow our own lead.
Steve Garfield
· 11 months ago
The Carol and Steve Show is now on YouTube too.
You can get there by following this simple to remember URL:
I'm slowly putting up all the episodes on YouTube.
Denise Jacobs
· 11 months ago
This is a great post, Chris. I am definitely psyching myself out looking numbers and wondering how I will ever finally "make it" in the industry as so many appear to be doing. But the advice to just be yourself and connect to people, no matter who they are, is so important. I like to believe that *everyone* who comes across our paths is important to us in one way or another, and connecting with anyone always takes you one more step further in life.
Lindsay Davies
· 11 months ago
Great post and well timed, with recent generalised or personal attacks about people's worth on Twitter. These are realistic, honest and normal thoughts which I think puts some sense back into communication. There are lots of egos using SM and also lots of regular people who just want to connect. I think your post is testament to your character adds weight to your comments. I like it.
James Hipkin
· 11 months ago
A wonderfully refreshing take. And so true. People are people.
Immediately after college, and that was some 30 years ago, I worked in Rock & Roll for 6 years and met and worked with many "famous" groups. Many were a**holes but a few understood that they weren't any better than their fans just on a different stage. I blogged about this in What I learned About Marketing from Rock and Roll. Many of the artist who had respect for people are still active today. The others, not so much. Respect is the key. Give it and you'll get it back.
Sarah (Real Life)
· 11 months ago
What a great post! I'm going to the same conference as Lisa, and I can't wait to meet some of my blogging friends and faves. I have to remember that I admire them because they're talented, not because they're "famous." My purpose in conversing with them would be to learn from them (and have fun).
I also notice that the most respected people on the web interact with the "average Janes" just as much as the elite. I love twitter, because I can actually have interaction on a conversational level with the Probloggers, MCHammers, Michelle Malkins (and Chris Brogans) of the world... even though I've never gotten a tweet from Chris yet {wink}
Kirsten Wright
· 11 months ago
Chris,
Thanks so much for the kind words, it was wonderful to talk with you. I agree completely with the fact that you are just a 'real person', but the fact that you are so human and easy to talk to is what makes it easy to put you on a pedestal. We respect you for the fact that you do still treat everyone the same. If in reality, you were a pompous jerk, you wouldn't stay on the pedestal for long. :)
Kirsten Wright
ryan perdue
· 11 months ago
Chris, I've always noticed that attitude with you and the people who have really helped me on twitter. We have all started somewhare and making connections are vital to life success. Nobody is the one answer the world is looking for doesn't matter what the numbers say. Thanks for doing what you do.
Dawn @ My Home Sweet Home
· 11 months ago
Great post! I'm off to read your other one you linked.
Lucretia Pruitt
· 11 months ago
Brilliantly dead on as always... But also the reason that I hear so often "Chris Brogan seems like a really nice guy - normal and down to Earth" after people meet you at a conference. Because when you start believing your own press, or even other people's press, you stop having a conversation and start having a fanversation - and I think those of us who love this space are all about the former, not the latter.
Kudos as usual.
Apolinaras Sinkevicius
· 11 months ago
Chris, Good job! Very good article that is relevant to many readers. I sure will forward the link to couple of guys and gals I mentor, so they know I am not pulling this out of my behind when I tell them to just be themselves and not get intimidated. If you are genuine, people will respond, no matter how successful they have gotten. As a matter of fact, the higher you climb, the more you need support from below. I bet you, Guy, and any others are more than happy to spent 5-10 minutes chatting with someone who is not blowing smoke up your behinds and is genuinely interested in providing value to the relationship. Do give and you shall receive. http://twitter.com/apsinkus
Teresa Wu
· 11 months ago
Chris, Your humbleness is seriously inspiring. I think sometimes we all need to remember what you've said here. People like Guy and Gary V have sent me very nice replies before, despite being absolutely inundated with emails, I'm sure... I think that's what I love most about people who are avid participators in social media — they are most often incredibly genuine, helpful, and willing to do as much as they can on an individual level.
Barbara Uechi
· 11 months ago
Chris, It's not really a pedestal. You're standing upon layers and layers of your own good, honest deeds and effort. It's much easier for me to see where I want to go if you're up there. I promise, if we ever meet in person, I will not bow deeply, more than once. :D
LisaJohnson
· 11 months ago
I have to say the person who told me about Twitter was @Pistachio and I just nodded, logged on and got an account. I've mingled at PodCamp Boston 2&3 and walked up to just about anyone and struck up a conversation. Only later when I started following them did I realized who they "were." It's one of the best things about Twitter. Popularity might be crucial for your business reason for being here but mostly I find as my followers increase, it's a great opportunity to just meet some really, really cool people. I feel like home here and you guys are all my friends, cousins and siblings. It's a great community that I hope stays pretty much the way it is.
Croz from Oz
· 11 months ago
Hi Chris
I LOVE your work. Just one question have you met Joe Vitali? and if you have please tell me that he is normal in real life. He comes across on the internet as one arrogant son of a ****. Who cares how many cars he has and how much they cost? It would be interesting to know Please @me to crozfromoz on twitter if you have any information
Abundance to All
Croz
Anna Haggerty
· 11 months ago
Wow what a great reception you have had on this post! I like the fact you have been so open and candid on this topic, if not a bit self promoting (as we all should be!) It appears from the comments many are star struck around certain people, whether the celeb has done anything to earn that fame or not.
We all need heros and mentors to look up to and the internet makes it a whole lot easier to access these people, and in itself created a whole range of celebs. What I find especially with Twitter is that you get for the first time a real sense of what a person is like.
So yes as you have said "People are just people" but some you will naturally be in awe of from the things they do or have achieved. And others should, in my opinion, take a good look around and be humbled by the real heros in this world who often go unnoticed.
Vanguy
· 11 months ago
Great post - it should give a lot of people confidence who might otherwise be intimidated by assuming the social media/online space hierarchy is exactly like their workplace, high school, etc.
Cheryl Smithem
· 11 months ago
Chris, such solid information is why we enjoy reading your words. I'd add to your post, the other two caveats which you alluded to: 1) Show up 2) Do the work; which you have. At the root of all life (after being fed, clothed, housed) is the need to feel loved/important in this world. Thank you for understanding humanity and for teaching us all.
davefleet
· 11 months ago
Great points Chris. The reason I still comment here is because you ARE all of those things, which I know from this site and from meeting you.
On the other hand, there are plenty of A-listers who only converse with each other and rarely reply to the "little people." They may just be people, but they don't seem to view themselves as such. I understand the 'scale' argument but it's clear that they decide to deal with it by prioritizing other high-profile personalities. That's fine; it doesn't hurt me.
Still, I have no time for people who do put themselves on pedestals. I don't comment, and rarely read, those "A-list" sites. Meanwhile, I read all of your posts. Thinking like that which you've shown here is why. Keep it up.
faryl
· 11 months ago
Right on, Chris! I've had the experience of being a receptionist up through manager at various companies, interacting with folks ranging in positions from the copier repair guy to CEOs of Fortune 100 companies. I also had the amazing experience of working at a radio station and getting to spend time with musicians and actors.
At the end of the day, everyone's the same. We're all people and we all deal with life, just different flavors of it.
I believe in offering all people the same respect with regard to privacy and space as anyone else. That said, just because someone has a well known name, more money than I do (which, let's face it, is just about anyone these days!) or a high power position, is not going to impact my decision to reach out my hand and say "Hi! How's your day going?".
Scott Mahler-Datex Media
· 11 months ago
I struggle with what you are talking about, on a much smaller scale. I feel the personal connection is so important to any aspect of life, but really sets one apart when speaking about business. I've actually stopped myself from growing my business because I wanted to make sure that I was able to keep up with the clients I already have and ensure they were getting the time and attention from me they deserveand I might add, they pay for. As far as feeling worthy enough compared to bigger companies and/or people than myself, I try and remember the exact things you've said here; people are just people and we are all worthy and valuable. That being said, while I don't put people on a pedestal, I do admire those that have acheived more than I have and try and learn from them whenever I can.
seanbailey
· 11 months ago
I'm relatively new to actively utilizing social media, blogs and such for more than chatting with friends. Early on I read a lot about you and clearly you're an online celebrity. It's refreshing to hear someone such as yourself say you treat each person as equal, because if your head gets too big to treat everyone equally, then you're not effectively using social media are you? I'm curious to know your early experiences with celebrity personalities online or off. Did you find people at all levels of celebrity status were generally willing to speak with you or have you experienced a lot of people putting themselves on pedestals?
@InSeansOpinion
David Murray
· 11 months ago
I think there will always be that high school cafeteria mentality... its in our nature to form groups based on some sort pre-determined-DNA infested-sense of hierarchy.
Maybe its the respect that you've earned based on what you achieved that gives you "rank" - fabricated or not its there. Those in your position have a great responsibility and with that will inevitably come certain connotations and expectations that we can only understand from reader perspective.
The beauty of this medium is that instead of a corner office there is only a thing curtain separating reader to you. This creates the opportunity to shatter any preconceived expectations of who you are.
Rayanne Langdon
· 11 months ago
OMG, you mean you'd actually talk to me IRL?! ; )
You are a stellar guy, Chris. Thanks for being real.
Philippa
· 11 months ago
Thanks for the great post. Nice to be reminded to not get fixated on the numbers game.
Marsha Keeffer
· 11 months ago
So many accolades - let me add mine. This is a great reminder to us all to be personable and approachable. Guess it's that old 'you catch more flies with honey' thing. Thanks, Chris - I always enjoy reading what you have to say....whenever, wherever!
Danny Brown
· 11 months ago
Well NOW where am I going to offer my hero worship to...??!!? ;-)
Although I've yet to meet you in person (hopefully '09 may change that) I know from the help, guidance and support you've given me personally since we've known each other cements my opinion of you as one of the good guys.
Humility goes a long way in my book - I've changed my views on many people based on that one crucial component. You've got it in spades, brother, and I'm glad to know you.
Justin McHood
· 11 months ago
Saw you at blogworld '08 in your Hawaiian shirt and thought you were a dork/dumbass/douchebag. Thought @pistachio talking about twitter was way cooler.
Saw you at Vegas '09 WordCamp in your business casual w/the power jacket and thought "this guy is a total star-wars nerd, but knows a bunch about social media"
Which one is true?
Probably both.
But thanks for being transparent and just callin' it like you see it - authenticity goes a long way. If K-mart or Sears want to pay you to post, fine by me -- I might even go buy some sheets if you keep it up.
Ben Grossman
· 11 months ago
I had a great time with you at CES09, Chris! This is a great and important post and something I look for in people who are receiving recognition anywhere. People are people--and it makes a person infinitely better if he realizes that. No matter how successful one becomes in a certain community (be it professional or otherwise), it's paramount that we maintain that perspective. As with all things, balance is key.
For me, that means that soon after every presentation I give or award I win, I spend time with people who couldn't care less about it (or at least don't care as much about it as my proverbial choir). My best friend (an actress) doesn't give a hoot if I just spoke at CES or if my last campaign idea made it to the top. She cares that I'm me - just a person - and we appreciate each other on that basis... no pedestal involved.
Sonny Gill
· 11 months ago
I was thankful enough to meet you at the MP Mixer in Arizona last year and I think I respected the way you treated people, more than anything. You hung out with a bunch of us the entire week (hot tub, ahem) and the humility you exuded was something else. You're just a real, sincere person and I think we all see and appreciate that.
Tony
· 11 months ago
Fantastically simple advise. I think a lot of us let our admiration of people and the work they do get in the way of the people part. It's nice to hear that the "famous" (internet or otherwise) think about it too. Until I get a chance to run into you IRL I'm very happy to be reading your blog and interacting via Twitter, keep it up :-)
Doug Firebaugh
· 11 months ago
Mature and sage advice Chris- Bravo! Wish more people had your wisdom instead of their ego. In the end-people are people and we all are same- I had a hugely successful person one time tell me the greatest wealth asset is humility- amen!
Julien
· 11 months ago
Chris puts his pants on one leg at a time, yes. Except that when his pants are on, he makes gold records.
Mary
· 11 months ago
Wonderful advice. At a time when I needed to hear it. I enjoy reading your blog because your genuine spirit comes through.
TStrump
· 11 months ago
I think something to consider is you can't really 'judge a book by its cover.' When I say that, I mean I treat everyone the same regardless of how they're dressed or what job 'social group' I think they're from. This is the best way to success and building a network.
Jenaé Plymale
· 11 months ago
So true. My mother always taught me this lesson. She's always told me this, and I've always believed her and my encounters with people tell me it's true. The encouragement and truth in this post is priceless. I hope more people take to it.
The Traveling Saleswoman
· 11 months ago
Chris, This has been one of your most insightful blog entries. I think people flock to you for the combination of excellent content alongside your approachability and humility. You don't lord your success over lesser mortals; instead, you have the attitude that everyone is valuable and has something to offer. I'm learning a lot from your website and your Tweets - so thanks!
John Hawkins
· 11 months ago
A quick story, if I may... I first met Chris at BlogWorldExpo in 2007. We spoke for no more than a minute. We then met again at BWE 2008, roughly 11 months after our first meeting. I was standing at a table talking to somebody, he walks up and when there was a break in the convo, Chris says to me, "Didn't we meet last year at BWE?" Now for me, this was a highlight moment. Somebody I had been following online and was a fan of recognized me in 1 second after meeting for less than a minute almost a year prior.
This speaks volumes to the type of guy Chris is.
Chris was gracious enough to come speak at WordCamp:Las Vegas. Every time I tried to thank him for coming, he would thank me for putting the event on and ALLOWING him to be part of it.
Chris is as down-to-Earth as they come. A class act all the way. I'm glad we had a chance to chat this past weekend and only hope that we get a chance to do it again real soon.
Ronald Lewis
· 11 months ago
Here's the post that's been festering in my mind for months now, only I've decided to create a video about this very subject. Chris is right that it's not simple to think that "people are people". I've connected with or met a lot of amazing people over the last 16 years, but one thing I realized early on is that they're no different from either of us.
CEOs, "A-list bloggers", celebrities, politicians and others all live and breathe the same. We all function on a very basic level in life as human beings. Everything else are extensions of our identity and existence (fame, fortune, relationships, etc.) It is our perception of these people which make them different (in our minds). Surprisingly, a lot of these people are truly average joes -- And I've met all types of them to know.
It's best to interact with these people like you would a friend -- Which is keeping the interaction simple, friendly and down-to-earth.
Thanks for posting this, Chris.
Adriel Hampton
· 9 months ago
Chris, you are so good for this space. Keep on keeping it real.
krissy knox
· 9 months ago
Great post. And one that everyone can learn from -- both those who keep themselves on pedastols, and those who think they are nobodies. Both need to hear these words... And yes, Chris, I do believe you treat everyone as equally important... :)
"People are people. Just treat them that way".. What are a great meaningful sentence. Instead of becoming freak on the celebrities and others we have to think that they are also people. Thanks for sharing a wonderful post Mr.Chris. I will follow this hereafter. golf business management
priceless_moments_caught
· 2 months ago
I have not much time, but I've got many useful things here, love it!
All Comments
i look forward to seeing you again soon!! :)
I'm heading to my first SMC DC meeting tomorrow night, and save a couple folks I don't recognize a single name on the RSVP list. And I couldn't be more excited. If people view this as an opportunity to connect rather than an intimidating nightmare, it helps.
Then again, I'm one of the more extroverted people I know. ;-) Advice like this is tough for the terminally shy.
Took me a while to think of people as people... I mean "Gosh! They're on tv. They're on the radio. They make 7 figures." -- As a photographer, people thought the same about the models I worked with "Oh my god! You have the best job! You get to work with all these hot models!" and I'd always reply "They're just people!" but it took a while to take my own advice when "leaving my niche" - you worded it really well.. and in this day and age when anyone can create a pedestal for themselves, it's important for people to realize that despite the fancy website, or 6 figure follower list... it's just a person.
I appreciate your candor. You're my hero. Hehehe.
I began following you on Twitter after I started reading your blog. It started for me because you offered valuable content. I stay with you, and continue to refer others to you, because not only do you consistently offer value, but you also do not condescend to readers, you keep it social, you interact, you share, you are "one of us." You are transparent (in a good way), you are helpful, and can I say...humble. While your numbers are very impressive, what I like about you is you are willing to take us with you on the journey. It's nice to be in the Chris Brogan circle of information. Thanks for being *real* Chris.
As Sarah pointed out, this is a helpful post for people who find social media conferences intimidating.
I think it's important to remember that reaching for influence is like trying to climb up on the pedestal. It's the pose of a usurper. Influence always carries a responsibility, an ethical bond toward those who trust you. That can be betrayed. We all have influence, to grow that is an issue of care.
Is that better or worse than putting someone on a pedestal though? I probably miss out on interesting conversations with engaging people but I feel better giving them a little bit of "normal" life.
Taking the initiative and kicking off a conversation is more exciting, though, and you never know how easy it is to relate to most people by just asking a few harmless questions. :)
I learned the lesson about people just being people a long time ago. Working in television, even on a local level, one gets to meet and work with all kinds of people, including people who have a certain "notoriety" or "fame". Over the years I got to meet got to meet plenty of famous folks, mostly bands, and meet and work with plenty of folks who weren't even famous yet (Barenaked Ladies and Tom Green come to mind).
Sure, when you first meet someone who is popular or famous, it can be exciting. But almost immediately, the novelty of that experience starts to wear off. Especially if you just look them in the eye, smile, and - ready for it - be yourself.
People are people are people. No matter how famous they are, mostly they just want to be treated like people. And you know what - the "welebrities" that you are itching to meet at the next conference, or trying to get the attention of on Twitter, are going to be MUCH more approachable if you don't suck up and just be yourself.
I went to a social media breakfast in Vancouver last weekend. Took me 10 hours to get there and back. I recognised a lot of people from their blogs. So did a lot of other people. So those people had all their time taken up surrounded by people who recognised them. Naturally, nobody recognised me, and I ended up talking to a bunch of nice people I didn't recognise.
It's not that I put the bloggers I knew on a pedestal. I just didn't feel like competing for their time, and facing the inequality of me recognising them, and persuading them that I was worth them spending time talking to instead of all the people they already knew.
Luckily, I was fairly self-aware about that. In the old days - like when I used to go to film festivals - I'd get pretty chippy about people thinking they were bigshots.
But I realise now that it's just a question of numbers. I really don't have that much to say that it's worth shoehorning my introduction into these people's day. And that's not lack of self-worth. It's just that I have nothing to sell. So I hang out in the less competitive part of the room. And have a less stressful time. I bet there are a lot of people like me at every gathering you go to.
The only way around it is for the people who know they're well known to come round and talk to all the people they don't know. But that means they get less (or no) time talking to all the people they do already know and actually *want* to spend quality time with.
Someone once said that "hell is other people". I'd add to that "if you allow it to be". In retrospect, I guess there was a bit more than saying "good job" here.
I'd just like to say that one reason why I enjoy reading your blog every day is that I do find you to be a real person that cares about helping others. Even in the spotlight you have always been humble and welcoming and that is something that I have found to be inspiring. Thank you.
I was actually thinking about this last night and wanted to blog about it because it is a realization that may sound simple but many people don't think about, and it is so important. We are all people. In terms of bloggers, I feel that people view our community as a hierarchy that has leaders' communities that everyone must be part of and that's how it is built. What people don't appreciate is that each and every blogger is an equal part of the community. Leaders such as yourself, Chris, has a larger following and act as a large segment of the community but you are still just another voice in the larger picture, the same as everyone else.
Will have to elaborate in my own segment of the community at some point. (=
Dave
Seriously...some people are wrapped to tight.
Thanks for telling them, as Joan Rivers's gynecologist told her...'Relax!'
sean808080
http://sean808080.com
So many people have great ideas out there, but I think its the ability of individuals to really care, respond and interact with users, as well as build community that sets them apart from the rest.
I definitely think that the way people behave on-line should mirror their values and behaviour off-line.
Its no secret one of the greatest things about social media is that it allows us to connect with a lot of people we admire, and they are often some kind of celebrity, but no matter how famous they are. You can always tell who the really big persons are by the way the relate and interact with people. For instance, last night, thanks to @rohitbarghava I was able to connect in twitter with @paulocoelho who was fast to welcome me, and I'm sure that doing that has been key for his success in connecting with so many people on-line and around the world.
So anyway, loved the post and wante to say: thank you for making yoursefl approachable.
Have a great week!
Valuable, helpful, and spot-on. I'm very new to Twitter and just started my blog, but excited about what this world, really this set of communicating tools, can offer.
I look forward to meeting sometime. In fact I have a question for you about how you see team dynamics and leadership helping or hurting progress in Web 2.0 organizations. Until this second I was deferring the question until I "knew you better" but, if it's a topic you have any passion for I'd love your thoughts.
A tweet? A quick phone interview that I'd blog? Let me know if this appeals. It's my passion.
Thanks again for this piece. Nice example of "authenticity is the currency of 2.0."
A.J. Pape
You have a terrific ability to write directly and convey valuable information while being personal. Thanks for writing cogently about things I need to know. I think you have hit on a critical point here, which is not that "celebrities" are just people, but that we are all people too. We matter. We can do great work. We all need to remember that we can all have a place at the discussion. It's difficult sometimes, when someone "famous" is present, to remember that. But please, to paraphrase from your Scoble anecdote above, have "something to say", not just a desire to be heard.
Shawn
To be perfectly honest, this is the first time I have actually read this blog. I always follow your tweets, watch your videos online, and read other random articles and interviews around the Web.
I am subscribed now. Not just to this blog, but to your message - a message that seems to be rooted deeply in your aspirations.
Liz Strauss recently said, "I don't care what you know unless I know that you care."
I know you care so now I want to know what you know.
It's hard to treat all people the same, but it is possible to treat all people fairly.
I'm not going to read everyone's blog and value their opinion as much as I would yours. I'm always going to be looking UP to you as a teacher, but that is because you step down from the pedestal at every opportunity. It is your followers that put you back up there - on display - for everyone else to see.
People are people, but some people are better at it than others.
Your newest subscriber,
-Allen
But what I will always remember is the way you treated me when we actually met up personally after your time in front of us. I went away from our discussion thinking, "Wow, Chris is just simply human!" You (along with Lorelle who followed you) made my whole trip to LV worthwhile.
Looking forward to keeping in touch.
allow me to feature you and your blog in my tomorrow's blog post @ Jean Ghalo Blog
Now I'm going to a blogging conference in February and I'll definitely try to heed your advice. I hope I can engage others in conversation, listen to their wants and needs, and help as much as I can.
You can get there by following this simple to remember URL:
http://carolandsteveshow.com
I bought that for Carol for xmas!
I'm slowly putting up all the episodes on YouTube.
Immediately after college, and that was some 30 years ago, I worked in Rock & Roll for 6 years and met and worked with many "famous" groups. Many were a**holes but a few understood that they weren't any better than their fans just on a different stage. I blogged about this in What I learned About Marketing from Rock and Roll. Many of the artist who had respect for people are still active today. The others, not so much. Respect is the key. Give it and you'll get it back.
I also notice that the most respected people on the web interact with the "average Janes" just as much as the elite. I love twitter, because I can actually have interaction on a conversational level with the Probloggers, MCHammers, Michelle Malkins (and Chris Brogans) of the world... even though I've never gotten a tweet from Chris yet {wink}
Thanks so much for the kind words, it was wonderful to talk with you. I agree completely with the fact that you are just a 'real person', but the fact that you are so human and easy to talk to is what makes it easy to put you on a pedestal. We respect you for the fact that you do still treat everyone the same. If in reality, you were a pompous jerk, you wouldn't stay on the pedestal for long. :)
Kirsten Wright
We have all started somewhare and making connections are vital to life success.
Nobody is the one answer the world is looking for doesn't matter what the numbers say.
Thanks for doing what you do.
Kudos as usual.
Good job! Very good article that is relevant to many readers. I sure will forward the link to couple of guys and gals I mentor, so they know I am not pulling this out of my behind when I tell them to just be themselves and not get intimidated.
If you are genuine, people will respond, no matter how successful they have gotten. As a matter of fact, the higher you climb, the more you need support from below. I bet you, Guy, and any others are more than happy to spent 5-10 minutes chatting with someone who is not blowing smoke up your behinds and is genuinely interested in providing value to the relationship. Do give and you shall receive.
http://twitter.com/apsinkus
Your humbleness is seriously inspiring. I think sometimes we all need to remember what you've said here. People like Guy and Gary V have sent me very nice replies before, despite being absolutely inundated with emails, I'm sure... I think that's what I love most about people who are avid participators in social media — they are most often incredibly genuine, helpful, and willing to do as much as they can on an individual level.
It's not really a pedestal. You're standing upon layers and layers of your own good, honest deeds and effort. It's much easier for me to see where I want to go if you're up there. I promise, if we ever meet in person, I will not bow deeply, more than once. :D
I LOVE your work. Just one question have you met Joe Vitali? and if you have please tell me that he is normal in real life. He comes across on the internet as one arrogant son of a ****. Who cares how many cars he has and how much they cost? It would be interesting to know Please @me to crozfromoz on twitter if you have any information
Abundance to All
Croz
I like the fact you have been so open and candid on this topic, if not a bit self promoting (as we all should be!) It appears from the comments many are star struck around certain people, whether the celeb has done anything to earn that fame or not.
We all need heros and mentors to look up to and the internet makes it a whole lot easier to access these people, and in itself created a whole range of celebs. What I find especially with Twitter is that you get for the first time a real sense of what a person is like.
So yes as you have said "People are just people" but some you will naturally be in awe of from the things they do or have achieved. And others should, in my opinion, take a good look around and be humbled by the real heros in this world who often go unnoticed.
On the other hand, there are plenty of A-listers who only converse with each other and rarely reply to the "little people." They may just be people, but they don't seem to view themselves as such. I understand the 'scale' argument but it's clear that they decide to deal with it by prioritizing other high-profile personalities. That's fine; it doesn't hurt me.
Still, I have no time for people who do put themselves on pedestals. I don't comment, and rarely read, those "A-list" sites. Meanwhile, I read all of your posts. Thinking like that which you've shown here is why. Keep it up.
At the end of the day, everyone's the same. We're all people and we all deal with life, just different flavors of it.
I believe in offering all people the same respect with regard to privacy and space as anyone else. That said, just because someone has a well known name, more money than I do (which, let's face it, is just about anyone these days!) or a high power position, is not going to impact my decision to reach out my hand and say "Hi! How's your day going?".
I'm curious to know your early experiences with celebrity personalities online or off. Did you find people at all levels of celebrity status were generally willing to speak with you or have you experienced a lot of people putting themselves on pedestals?
@InSeansOpinion
Maybe its the respect that you've earned based on what you achieved that gives you "rank" - fabricated or not its there. Those in your position have a great responsibility and with that will inevitably come certain connotations and expectations that we can only understand from reader perspective.
The beauty of this medium is that instead of a corner office there is only a thing curtain separating reader to you. This creates the opportunity to shatter any preconceived expectations of who you are.
You are a stellar guy, Chris. Thanks for being real.
Although I've yet to meet you in person (hopefully '09 may change that) I know from the help, guidance and support you've given me personally since we've known each other cements my opinion of you as one of the good guys.
Humility goes a long way in my book - I've changed my views on many people based on that one crucial component. You've got it in spades, brother, and I'm glad to know you.
Saw you at Vegas '09 WordCamp in your business casual w/the power jacket and thought "this guy is a total star-wars nerd, but knows a bunch about social media"
Which one is true?
Probably both.
But thanks for being transparent and just callin' it like you see it - authenticity goes a long way. If K-mart or Sears want to pay you to post, fine by me -- I might even go buy some sheets if you keep it up.
For me, that means that soon after every presentation I give or award I win, I spend time with people who couldn't care less about it (or at least don't care as much about it as my proverbial choir). My best friend (an actress) doesn't give a hoot if I just spoke at CES or if my last campaign idea made it to the top. She cares that I'm me - just a person - and we appreciate each other on that basis... no pedestal involved.
When I say that, I mean I treat everyone the same regardless of how they're dressed or what job 'social group' I think they're from.
This is the best way to success and building a network.
This has been one of your most insightful blog entries. I think people flock to you for the combination of excellent content alongside your approachability and humility. You don't lord your success over lesser mortals; instead, you have the attitude that everyone is valuable and has something to offer. I'm learning a lot from your website and your Tweets - so thanks!
I first met Chris at BlogWorldExpo in 2007. We spoke for no more than a minute. We then met again at BWE 2008, roughly 11 months after our first meeting. I was standing at a table talking to somebody, he walks up and when there was a break in the convo, Chris says to me, "Didn't we meet last year at BWE?" Now for me, this was a highlight moment. Somebody I had been following online and was a fan of recognized me in 1 second after meeting for less than a minute almost a year prior.
This speaks volumes to the type of guy Chris is.
Chris was gracious enough to come speak at WordCamp:Las Vegas. Every time I tried to thank him for coming, he would thank me for putting the event on and ALLOWING him to be part of it.
Chris is as down-to-Earth as they come. A class act all the way. I'm glad we had a chance to chat this past weekend and only hope that we get a chance to do it again real soon.
CEOs, "A-list bloggers", celebrities, politicians and others all live and breathe the same. We all function on a very basic level in life as human beings. Everything else are extensions of our identity and existence (fame, fortune, relationships, etc.) It is our perception of these people which make them different (in our minds). Surprisingly, a lot of these people are truly average joes -- And I've met all types of them to know.
It's best to interact with these people like you would a friend -- Which is keeping the interaction simple, friendly and down-to-earth.
Thanks for posting this, Chris.
krissy knox :)
follow me on twitter:
http://www.twitter.com/iamkrissy
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